Two Completely Different Things Incident

On August 10th, 1993 at a NASA office in Cape Canaveral, Florida a man pressed on an experimental button that paused time flow, he moved around in this paused time removing air and creating a vacuum, in which items flew into, the items that flew in to replace the vacuum creating a loop in which items would replace themselves.

In order to keep the identities of the people involved in the incident secret, we will simply refer to them as Subject A, Subject B, Subject C, Subject D, etc.

The leadup
Subject A was the newest employee at NASA's trollge office building, in this office many of the worlds top scientists were working on a way to stop the space-time continuum. Subject A was seen as a troller among his coworkers, so the first thing he did after seeing a button that said "do not press" was to press the button. This triggered the contraption that the scientists were working on. It was incomplete as the scientists has not yet figured out how to stop a vacuum from forming when a man in paused time moved.

Paused Time
After a while, Subject A identified that he was in paused time and 'did a little trolling." In the form of terrible pranks on his coworkers, more common ones are pulling down of pants, replacing coffee with other drinks, and toilet papering. He un-paused time after he was satisfied was trolling, but then the universe trolled him.

The Incident
After he un-paused time, the vacuum the removed air created sucked in nearby items. When those items were removed, it left a vacuum in its place. This created a loop in which items would forcefully replace each other. The vacuum needed more items, so the area of effect for this incident exploded until it covered every corner of the earth. Items would continuously fly around, this included people, an estimate of 14,400 people were pushed around of had an item pushed on them, killing and estimate 1,700 directly. This incident gets it's name from an office worker who went to the bathroom, came back and noticed the item on her desk, which were supposed to be a gift for her boyfriend, was swapped with another item, she exclaimed "the items on my desk, they're Two Completely Different Things!" The story of the name's origin sparked British funk band Jamiroquai to create a song in 2010 entitled "Two Completely Different Things."